Hi Harnidh! Thanks for penning this down. It is so thoroughly thought. You have described so many subtle thoughts that I had not put in words.
Overall, I am very aligned with your message. Nobody deserves disrespect for the way they look, colour, shape & size. People should learn to love themselves, because they deserve the best. This mindset puts people to work on themselves to enjoy the life.
Having said that, I offer a different perspective on a few things.
I don't know you well nor am I your friend. So this is no way a generalization.
I have been a fat person at a certain point in my life. I relate to a lot of what you described.
There is a fine line between deserving respect vs earning respect.
People are gravitated towards the energy you give out. Not necessarily the way you look. If they are talking to you just because you look a certain way, then maybe they are not worth our time.
Real friends will stick around through tough times too.
Wishing the world treated me in a certain way or the world is not made for me seems like not taking responsibility for yourself. It gives me the feeling that we are playing the victim card.
Sure, the restaurant could have better chairs, sure the aisles could have been wider.
But, life is neutral. The mountain you want to hike does not discriminate. If I am fat and lose breath in 10 minutes, then the mountain is not unfair. I just have to put in the work to be able to hike it. Losing weight is just a by-product.
Like you said, losing weight doesn't mean I am superior to others. Same is with any other achievement, like making millions of dollars. I could lose it anytime.
When people ask me to help them with weight loss, it makes me uncomfortable when the goal is just about looking a certain way. I also wanted to look a certain way but eventually, the work that I put in to get there shapes my values and my life philosophy.
I know that you are working on yourself very hard for the life you deserve, losing weight is one of those things that enable you to live a life you want. That's it!
Hi Harnidh! Thanks for penning this down. It is so thoroughly thought. You have described so many subtle thoughts that I had not put in words.
Overall, I am very aligned with your message. Nobody deserves disrespect for the way they look, colour, shape & size. People should learn to love themselves, because they deserve the best. This mindset puts people to work on themselves to enjoy the life.
Having said that, I offer a different perspective on a few things.
I don't know you well nor am I your friend. So this is no way a generalization.
I have been a fat person at a certain point in my life. I relate to a lot of what you described.
There is a fine line between deserving respect vs earning respect.
People are gravitated towards the energy you give out. Not necessarily the way you look. If they are talking to you just because you look a certain way, then maybe they are not worth our time.
Real friends will stick around through tough times too.
Wishing the world treated me in a certain way or the world is not made for me seems like not taking responsibility for yourself. It gives me the feeling that we are playing the victim card.
Sure, the restaurant could have better chairs, sure the aisles could have been wider.
But, life is neutral. The mountain you want to hike does not discriminate. If I am fat and lose breath in 10 minutes, then the mountain is not unfair. I just have to put in the work to be able to hike it. Losing weight is just a by-product.
Like you said, losing weight doesn't mean I am superior to others. Same is with any other achievement, like making millions of dollars. I could lose it anytime.
When people ask me to help them with weight loss, it makes me uncomfortable when the goal is just about looking a certain way. I also wanted to look a certain way but eventually, the work that I put in to get there shapes my values and my life philosophy.
I know that you are working on yourself very hard for the life you deserve, losing weight is one of those things that enable you to live a life you want. That's it!
Those are the things I wanted to say.
Well said Satvik!